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REVOLUTIONARY COMMON SENSE LIBRARY

What's a "Behavior"?

Revolutionary Common Sense by Kathie Snow

www.disabilityisnatural.com

Heard in places here and there is a newly-coined phrase, “He had a behavior.” Now what, pray tell, does this mean, and why, for Pete’s sake, are people using these words?

Let me digress for a moment and state a maxim which, if adopted by all, could have an extremely positive impact on people with disabilities and their status in society. Here it is: if it’s not right for a person without a disability, it’s not right for a person with a disability.

What is “it”? Anything! The way a person is treated, talked to, talked about, and anything else.
Thus, most of us would not say, “He/she had a behavior,” when talking about a husband or wife, a co-worker, or a boss. (You wouldn’t, would you?) Therefore, we shouldn’t say it about people who have disabilities!

Based on the context of the conversations, when parents and professionals (but never people with disabilities) say, “He had a behavior,” I’m going to infer this means the person misbehaved (according to the speaker). And I’m going to assume this terminology is supposed to replace the more familiar terms, “acted up,” “threw a fit,” “had a tantrum,” and so forth. Furthermore, I’m assuming this phrase refers specifically to one or more particular actions which the person with a disability is supposed to know he is not to do; e.g., his “behavior plan” details actions which are big no-no’s and which have definite consequences and/or punishments. (But we must wonder if he knows what’s in his “behavior plan,” and if he was involved in the writing of same.)

Furthermore, it seems a “behavior” is a descriptor intended to identify actions relative to a person’s diagnosis and/or environment. When a person with autism bites himself, that’s a “behavior.” When a person with a cognitive disability refuses to “comply,” that’s a “behavior.” And maybe when a resident of a group home or a worker in a segregated work setting doesn’t follow the rules, the action might be called a “behavior.”

What’s the purpose of this new way of talking? I’m not really sure. But one of the outcomes is that any and all behaviors of a person with a disability are frequently attributed to the disability! When a six-year-old with a disability is not interested in the boring lesson at school, her refusal to complete the project is labeled “manipulation.” The teacher “knows” that “all children with disabilities learn to be manipulative at an early age.” But the same behavior in a six-year-old without a disability does not evoke the same response.

I’ve learned from many wonderful experts (Joe Schiappacasse, Herb Lovett, and others) that behavior is communication, whether one has a disability or not. Biting, head banging, withdrawal, outbursts, and other typical and not so typical actions are all forms of communication.

People with disabilities who don’t have effective means of communication (oral speech, communication device, etc.), as well as those who have never been listened to, may have no other way to communicate their wants, needs, or feelings except by physical actions. And in too many instances, parents, teachers, service providers, professionals, and others view these actions as “inappropriate behaviors,” instead of as the person’s best efforts to communicate! Consequences or punishments are delivered; the person tries to communicate his resulting sadness, fear, or frustration through physical actions; these are once again viewed as “inappropriate behavior” and the cycle continues and even escalates!

There’s much to learn about communication and behavior. Instead of saying, “He had a behavior,” perhaps we could more accurately and respectfully state, “He’s trying to tell us something.”

©2002-06 Kathie Snow, www.disabilityisnatural.com. Permission is granted for non-commercial use of this article: you may print this web page and photocopy it to share with others. Click here to download the PDF handout version of the article. As a courtesy, please tell me (kathie@disabilityisnatural.com) how/when you use it. Do not violate copyright laws: request permission before reprinting or republishing in newsletters, on websites, or in other media. Clip art from www.clipartinc.com.

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Our words reflect the way we think, so let's get rid of descriptors like "handicapped, physically disabled, mentally retarded, learning disabled" and other words that focus on the condition instead of the person. People First Language promotes dignity and respect for all!

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