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REVOLUTIONARY COMMON SENSE LIBRARY
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Everyone Needs
to Be Needed
Revolutionary Common Sense by Kathie Snow
www.disabilityisnatural.com
We are all born helpers. Think of young children who try their hardest to help Daddy in the yard, or want to push the vacuum cleaner with their tiny hands. As we grow, we help with chores around the house. And at different points during our adolescence, we may decide we’re not too keen on helping, but we usually do it anyway. As adults, we come full circle: we help because it feels good, because we believe in a cause or an organization, or because someone tells us they need our help. We need to care about others; to feel responsible for something or someone outside of ourselves. It feels good to be needed; we need to be needed—all of us.
Volunteering at church, being a youth leader, cleaning up a
park, and a variety of other helping activities create that wonderful
feeling of being needed. Helping also shifts our focus to others—we put our
own dilemmas aside for awhile. In giving to others, we give ourselves a
gift.
Sadly, we have exempted many children and adults with disabilities
from both the responsibilities and joys of helping. We may
feel they’re
unable to help. But this simply is not true!
When my son was in kindergarten, he used a manual wheelchair
that he could push only for short distances. However, this
didn’t cause
any real problems since his classmates were more than willing to help. In
fact, they fought over who would have the privilege of pushing!
One day, Benj came home and said, “Mommy, I wish someone else in my
class used a wheelchair.” I thought he meant he didn’t want
to be the only one who was “different.” But to be sure, I asked
him why. He replied, “Cause I would like to help someone, too!” He
saw how important his friends felt when they helped; Benj wanted to feel
needed and important, too. From then on, we made sure to find ways Benj
could help others. Because he had used a computer from a very young age,
he was able to help his peers who didn’t know much about computers.
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When people with disabilities are expected to help others,
they will—like the rest of us—rise to the occasion. They’ll
feel needed, valuable, and important, just as other helpers do. But the
benefits don’t stop there. When we see what people with disabilities
can do to help others, we’ll see abilities and strengths we didn’t
see before. We’ll learn how competent people with disabilities really
are. And when a person with a disability volunteers in the community, connections
are formed and friendships are made, both of which can lead to employment,
independent living, inclusion, and real lives.
We can no longer afford to deny people the pleasures and
responsibilities of helping. Everyone has something to
contribute. Someone needs the assistance of the child or adult
with a disability in your life; create the opportunity and then
share in the joy!
©2002-07 Kathie Snow; all rights reserved. Permission is granted for non-commercial use of this article: you may print this web page and photocopy it to share with others. Click here to download the PDF handout version of the article. As a courtesy, please tell me (kathie@disabilityisnatural.com) how/when you use it. This is the intellectual property of Kathie Snow and is protected by Copyscape; permission is required before republishing in newsletters, on websites, etc. Clip art from Adobe In-Design.
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Our words reflect the way we think, so let's get rid of descriptors like "handicapped, physically disabled, mentally retarded, learning disabled" and other words that focus on the condition instead of the person. People First Language promotes dignity and respect for all!
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