I am mom to three kids with disabilities. With my first, we did all the therapists, tried everything. Our entire day was focused on driving here and driving there, and hearing about the four million things my child needed, what he should do, etc.—and all the information, no matter how well-intended, seemed to contradict all the other information.

With my third son, who had the same differences as my first, I didn't have him tested and we didn't do all the therapies. I looked at his needs and found ways to help him at home. All was fine until he began feeling low energy for too long of a time.

The doctor said, "Why not go to the neurologist and see if this is connected with your son's birth injury?" We did, and were told, "OH MY GOD!!! HE NEEDS BRAIN SURGERY RIGHT NOW OR HE WILL DIE! But we won't do the surgery until four days from now, BUT HE MAY DIE SO HE HAS TO STAY RIGHT HERE, HE CAN'T GO HOME." And yes, they said it that way: loud, quiet, then loud.

I took him home for the time being, found alternative therapists (craniosacral practitioners), and we got to work. Within a day he was feeling better. I canceled the surgery.

The hospital called state officials and said I was abusing my son, that he MUST have the surgery. I was given 24 hours to bring my son to the hospital for surgery or else. I found another neurologist at the hospital who did every test on earth and said, "I see why he could have the surgery, but he is not in any danger." At that point, I was afraid to take my son back home, because I didn't want to risk having my son taken away. So I said, "Do the surgery."

The moral of this story? I'm not quite sure. I do know that mothers know best! Our children often know best, too. As they get older, they know even better than their parents. Doctors see people with disabilities as "less than," "wrong," or "negative." They see all disabilities as something that needs to be 'fixed' no matter the consequences. It's all very upsetting, even five years later...thank you for letting me share this.

Anonymous